What We Did on January 22

I'm sure most of you know that January 22 is the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that essentially legalized abortion on demand in the United States. For 37 years, people have been going to Washington DC to march for life while others have participated in events in their own communities. Here in Springfield, we've typically marked the day with a pro-life rally at the Capitol building on the Sunday closest to January 22.

This year was a little different. As I wrote about here, Planned Parenthood in Springfield announced last fall that they would begin offering RU-486, commonly known as "the abortion pill," starting sometime in early 2010. This will be the first time elective abortions will be available in Springfield. Many of my friends and I (those who blog here as well as others we are friends with) were, to put it bluntly, pretty ticked off about this news. We felt like we couldn't just sit back and let Planned Parenthood have their way with the women and children of our community. So, we decided to fight. And if you know what this blog is all about, you'll guess that we naturally turned to our most powerful weapon - the Rosary.

We started compiling an e-mail list of pro-life people and sent out notifications whenever we heard that someone was going to Planned Parenthood to pray. We posted notices on this blog. We tried to get the word out any way we could. We wanted to build an army of prayer warriors to combat this evil.

The response was . . . not great. There are as many reasons that people didn't come as there are people on the e-mail list. I'm going to suggest a few: work conflicts, lack of adequate childcare, health problems, other charitable commitments. And, if the people on the e-mail list are anything like me, there was another reason they didn't come: fear. The fear of possible confrontation. The fear of being "outed" in your own community as being one of "those people" who do things "like that." The fear that once you put yourself out there publicly, there's no turning back. And if they're anything like me, they weren't actively looking for a way out, but were happy to have something else to do that prevented them from going to Planned Parenthood to pray.

Still, we weren't ready to just give up. We knew we wanted to do something to show Planned Parenthood that there are plenty of people in this area who oppose their work. So, we kept praying about it and asking the Holy Spirit to lead us where He wanted us to go.

God took us up on our offer. Where He led us was to organize an all-day prayer vigil outside of Planned Parenthood on January 22. We were blessed to have the support of Springfield Right to Life and our Diocesan Office for Social Concerns. We made up fliers and started getting them distributed to the area churches, Catholic and otherwise. We were hoping to get about 30 people to participate - enough to have 2 people praying during 14 30-minute shifts over the course of the day.

As so often happens when you go into a partnership with God, we gave a little bit and God responded with abundance. We had at least 100 people come to the vigil that day. Though people signed up for 30-minute shifts, many stayed far longer. We had school-aged children, moms with pre-schoolers (though we left the pre-schoolers in a safe place with snacks, videos, and plenty of other moms to watch them), business men and women, retirees, clergy and religious, high schoolers, home schoolers - you name it, we had it. And I'm sure we would have had more had our compatriots who went to DC for the March been home at the time. The vigil was peaceful, prayerful, and a beautiful testament to the commitment so many have to the protection of innocent human life. You can read the story about it from our Diocesan newspaper here.

I learned a lot while planning the vigil. I learned that God is waiting for us to make ourselves available to Him. I learned that He really will give us all we need to do His Will. I learned that when we do God's Will we sometimes suffer, but that God gives us consolations that make the suffering seem manageable and even, in a way, a gift. I learned that when we seek to do God's Will, what we end up doing is not our project. It's God's project. We don't have to be perfect, we don't have to be completely in control, we don't even have to be particularly well-suited for the task at hand. Whatever is lacking in us, God will supply many, many times over.

The most important thing I learned is the lesson I will have to keep learning for the rest of my life - that God really is God and that I can trust Him. There were times while planning the vigil that I would start to feel anxious about things that were not under my control. I had to remind myself at those times to stop and pray this prayer, "You are God. You are the Creator of all human life. You will do with this vigil whatever needs to be done for the salvation of souls. I'm going to trust You on this." Every time I prayed this prayer - every time - I was filled with peace. Sometimes, I was given an overwhelming sense of God's presence. I can't explain it, but I would know that He was right there next to me (or, to be more precise, within me), guiding me and giving me the grace I needed to keep moving forward.

This post has gotten pretty lengthy, so I think I'll wrap it up, though I have many more things I could say. Like an Oscar winner, I'll close by thanking people, realizing that I'll probably leave someone out. I am grateful for the women God has placed in my life, especially those who helped plan this vigil. I am grateful for the people at the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois and Springfield Right to Life, who provided support and guidance throughout the planning process. I am grateful for my pastor, one of the holiest priests I have ever known, for his courageous witness in so many ways to the sanctity of all human life and for his advice, guidance, and prayers for me. I am grateful for all of the people who prayed at Planned Parenthood last week, for those who supported us in prayer, and for those who helped by babysitting our children. I am grateful for my husband, who supported me throughout the whole endeavor and took time off of work to pray with us. I am grateful for my older sons, who joined their father and me in prayer. I am grateful for my younger sons, who behaved that day while in the care of my generous friends. And, of course, I am thankful to God, the Lord and Giver of Life, for the graces He showers down on me. If I have forgotten to express my gratitude for anyone else, please be assured that I am thankful for you too.

I hope that we will have more prayer vigils and that one day, abortion will be one of those horrible things that people did in the past that we can't imagine ever doing ourselves. Until then, I'll be working the beads and I hope you will too.

NEVER PUT WHEAT IN YOUR DIAPER BAG!!!

I use my diaper bag to carry almost everything - including the items at the store when I don't want (to deal with) a grocery basket. I'm not sure what the checkout lady must think when I start unloading stuff from my bag!?

Recently, a friend offered to give me a few grains of wheat for a liturgical project. Where did they go? Into the diaper bag of course! I promptly removed them from my bag when I got home, planning to work on my project later. I had however, missed one of the grains.

As I continued to use my diaper bag for whatever outings we went on, this grain of wheat gradually broke and disintegrated in the outside pocket of my bag. I finally realized what was going on and knew I needed to clean out the bag, but I conveniently continued to avoid doing so. Eventually, things came to such a head that it was necessary to clean it out if I wanted to avoid getting pricked and poked by these tiny wheat needles. As I sat there doing this, one of my weaknesses became very apparent to me.

I get frustrated all the time at little things.

When I drop something, I get frustrated. When I bump myself, I get frustrated. When I misplace something, I get frustrated. There is a book called Practising the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence. I've never read it, but that phrase has always intrigued me. I realized in the moment of cleaning up the wheat (when I needed to move slowly and deliberately to avoid getting hurt) that when I let that frustration fester inside of me, I am not practising the presence of God. I'm great at not swearing (aloud) but my internal emotion could best be defined by a word said with great emphasis: errrRAH! or D***. Practising the presence of God would look something like this I suppose: I drop something, and I (in a PEACEFUL-FRAME-OF-MIND) pick it up. Something didn't go wrong; it just didn't go the way I wanted, i.e. perfect. Where this weakness really gets to me is when enough of these small instances occur, and I start feeling frustrated with my husband. He hasn't done anything wrong, he just didn't do ___ the way I wanted. And all of a sudden, it's time to go to Confession!

But it all started with the small little things. How do I get to the PEACEFUL state of mind? Calling on the most powerful name of all, Jesus. And what about after I've blown it already, and I just wanna wallow in my frustration and pity myself?? Well, the thought pops into my mind, "my mother wouldn't like this; okay Mary, I really need some help. I can't get out by myself."

"She will come to your aid. What mother doesn't have compassion for her children? As the mother of the one who had the greatest compassion on all of us, hers is by exension, as encompassing as Christ's."

So the moral of the story is: don't ever, ever put wheat in your diaper bag!

Pray, Pray, Pray!

Pray, pray and never cease to pray. For, if you pray, your salvation is secured; if you neglect prayer, your perdition is inevitable. Such should be the practice of all preachers and confessors, since all Catholics maintain, that he who prays will infallibly obtain grace, and will be saved. But the number of those who practice prayer is very small, and therefore but few obtain eternal life.

– St. Alphonsus Ligouri, Treatise on Prayer